Littlefinger Lovin’

I long to eat the fish, and I do not mean her symbol
Oh sweet Lysa had missed her menstrual, so now im counting nickles
Yes my Lady had drank Moon Tea, but at least she gave good spittle
Like waves going back and forth we married at the riffle
That night you could hear the pounding, im not talking about the drizzle
Gotta love the fish for she is hotter then a griddle
Does not argue, nor does she quibble and if she bites it’s just a nibble
And even if my nicknames Little, you could hear Lysa scream oh how so blissful

by Ndrew of Typhgarian

The Tale of Lysa and Littlefinger

The Tully woman’s belly was large
Her mind was largely flighty
But underneath that auburn hair
There dwelt an anger mighty!

“Oh Lysa dear, be my own,
I’ll never love another
Our hearts and bodies will join as one
Like a Lannister with her brother!”

“Oh Petyr dearest, I love you so,
And mine own husband is toothless
Considering he’s a man of 74,
Killing him’s not so ruthless!”

And so the dastard deed was done
And Jon A. was sadly done in
But can we blame poor Lysa when
We recall Jon’s breath (of onions?)

And so the two were joined and wed
Lysa Aryn and the man she treasured
And indeed, without exaggeration we can say
The whole Eyrie heard her pleasured.

But then young Sansa Stark
Came prettily to the castle
And Littlefinger said “Let me inside!”
(And he didn’t mean their house, the rascal!)

So Lysa lost it, Sansa cried
LF made his lady fly
But he kept his “daughter” by his side,
To molest her on the sly

Until the day when at the keep
A mysterious crone came walking
And a stupid Kettleblack
Chose to let her right on in, a gawking

“Lord Baelish, you may be young
But I swear your bedroom skills unworthy
And your lust for little girls,
Is really just quite pervy!”

And so she made the bastard fly
The thing went off without a hitch
And as he flew into the air
She shouted, “Only Ned, you bitch!”

by Queen Cersei I