On the first day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: A Raven in a Heart Tree On the second day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the third day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the fourth day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the fifth day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the sixth day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Six Direwolves a Howling Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the seventh day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Seven Kingdoms Warring Six Direwolves a Howling Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the eighth day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Eight Naked Maidens Seven Kingdoms Warring Six Direwolves a Howling Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the ninth day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Nine Dancing Masters Eight Naked Maidens Seven Kingdoms Warring Six Direwolves a Howling Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the tenth day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Ten Lords a Plotting Nine Dancing Masters Eight Naked Maidens Seven Kingdoms Warring Six Direwolves a Howling Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the eleventh day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Eleven Wildlings Raiding Ten Lords a Plotting Nine Dancing Masters Eight Naked Maidens Seven Kingdoms Warring Six Direwolves a Howling Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree On the twelfth day of ASOIAF GRRM sent to me: Twelve Bards a Rhyming Eleven Wildlings Raiding Ten Lords a Plotting Nine Dancing Masters Eight Naked Maidens Seven Kingdoms Warring Six Direwolves a Howling Five Golden Dragons Four Black Crows Three Lemon Cakes Two Hot Pies and a Raven in a Heart Tree
You are my Hotty Pie, sugarplum, Pumpy-umpy-umpkin, you’re my cherry tart, You’re my cuppycake, honey, Smoogums-boogums, the true king of my heart, And I love you so and I want you to know That I’ll always be right here And I love to sing sweet songs to you Because you’re, oh, so dear
En Garde, Sweetling Hot Pie generally sucks He is a little kid that curses more then me, fuck Was going to rob Arya, but Gendry would have kicked his butt So he told us that disturbing story about kicking a dude in the nuts
Lommy wanted to yield, Hot Pie was debeating He thought Arry was just blindly Lannister hating And gave up on Arya and Gendry for baking The only humble birth person is a piece of shit, thats all I’m saying
To defend Hot Pie with rhyme With all the banners blazing we ride
It is a different art than making pastry creations But genius cooks are born only once a generation And the one that has that pride Is Hot Pie! Hot Pie! Hot Pie!
At the age another would be dwindling idly He has proved himself already greatly.
His pies have pleased the very lord of leeches Even when Hot Pie was out of peaches
He likes to smell, to taste and to prepare And he is always willing to share He tried to steal a tart for hungry Arry The cook saw it and that was scary.
But when his friend asked for more help In his warm quarters he did not stay to dwell Into the night he rode on stolen horse And raised the mood of all with happy songs.
No matter how late the hour, our bards always deliver!
Its late I see and everyone has left the board but me I’m not much for poetry but let me see what I can make of a night like thee
Arya, Hot Pie, Jaqen H’gar what a trio you make circumstance brought you together to a castle by the lake
The God’s Eye preceded you here Its wisdom and knowledge are not easy to hear Oh how I wish you would not despair For GRRM has foretold Howland Reed shall appear
I love rolls, buns and cakes, On pies I can brekfast and dine, But when we were out of luck I closed my eyes and ate a bug, And it felt just fine.
I like to sing all cheery songs, I know them to last line, But when my friends unsheat their swords, I stand by them against high lords. And I yell “Hot Pie!”
For I am the master of flour and salt, My bread and tarts never dry, When others cry murder and charge on the field, I’m the badass that yells HOT PIE!
