Even though his son he did lose
The Greatjon might give us good news
Our great expectation
Is his liberation
To send Robb’s regards back to Roose

By Myrish Swamp Thing

Mance Rayder: The Evil Baker of Winterfell

“The Best Pies  in the North”

Starring ABEL THE BARD and THE BOLTONS, RAMSAY AND ROOSE
With the NORTHMEN’S CHORUS and the SPEARWIVES on BELLS

(Manderly asks Abel the Bard to sing to Roose and Ramsay Bolton when they arrive for dinner.  He is to seat them and make sure they eat all their pie, and vegetables too, just like Wun Wun.)

(Boltons enter the dining hall stage right.  All the other guests are already seated at a long conference-like table.  Guests wear color coordinated pink bibs with a monogrammed “B” dripping red blood, as opposed to any other color.
When the Bolton Boys come in, Lady Dustin leads the Northmen in a delightful welcome of pounding silverware on the table. The dogs howl.  Some unknown person flicks a pea in Ramsay’s eye.  Abel jumps up and moves quickly to the Boltons, guiding them like checker pieces to their respective seats at the ends of the table.)

ABEL THE BARD
Look!
The Boltons!
Hey!  Hold up!  Why the rush?  Why the hurry?
Do you find it necessary to scurry?
Rest a minute – please sit, sit  you down, sit!
(Abel pushes first one Bolton and then another in his designated chair ).
All of us have been waiting on dinner.
We must try these pies, ser.
Now I don’t mean to boast.
What was that? Oh, I know quite well you are the host.
By the way, today’s the day!
Don’t avoid it.
We truly tried, sers!
Join us for some pie, sers.  Sit back, rest up and inhale.
Hey Squirrel, bring Roose and his son a cup of ale.
These are the best pies in the North.
Fill up your belly and sully forth. No.
‘Til you know.
(Roose and Ramsay begin to eat, nodding approvingly at the slices of pie.)
Yes?  Good?  Yes …
The best pies in the North …
I am so right.  The best pies in the North!
Come on, try it.  Take a bite.
A culinary delight.
It tastes so right.
You have to admit it.
Drink this, you’ll need it.
The best pies in the North.
Better than road kill from the street
Here it is.
When and if we get it!
But we don’t really have a say
In the new menu a la Frey
Finding those
Animals
And them dying at our feet.
Manderly ordered three pies as a treat.
But I did notice in the ovens something weird.
Did one of the Freys wear a beard?
There are lots of ways.
To cook up the Freys!
Popping people into pies!
Wouldn’t do that in my home.
Just the thought of it makes me sick.
I tell you those Freys are pretty quick.
Is that your tummy that did groan?
Nothing is better than the best pies in the North.
Eat before we sally forth!
(Boltons start vomiting atop the table; then fall to their knees to continue while Northmen chorus does a brief two step back and forth, stage right then left.  Northmen must do a kick line as well.  Abel continues from a perch on the backs of Ramsay and Roose, left foot on Ramsay and right on Roose).
Roose, are you molting?
Human pies are revolting?
And gritty – what a pity!
Boltons look white as ghosts.
Roose has thrown up the most.
And the best pies in the North.
Boltons.
Freys are dead.
And we’ll have your head!
We’ll use you
In our pies too!


by evita mgfs

Lord Walder Frey
A blacker shade of grey
His guests got a little miffed,
Cos a betrayal they sniffed.

Roose Bolton, that crazy cake
It would do him good if he does wake
Otherwise, his cry won’t be heard
For people will believe that his death is absurd

His son Ramsay, the butcher renowned
He got his paws of Winterfell crown,
But nothing lasts long
And maniacs don’t get their song

Lord Petyr, where do I start
He is definitely smart
But his cruelty towards others is unmatched,
Therefore his body shall be detached.

by DR Supporter

Villains - Roose

They call him the Leech Lord
Roose Bolton, eyes of ice
He reigns at the Dreadfort
And he never speaks twice

Hush, hush, everyone
Be quiet when he is speaking
He’ll raise his voice for no one
Your eyes will be leaking

If you cross m’lord
Flaying is his punishment of choice
You’ll have bed and board
With only dogs to hear your voice

Bed down in the straw
In the dungeons where you’re kept
Catch rats and eat them raw
Down there, no one’s ever slept

Screams ring out daily
Screams pierce the night
Begging, arms flailing
A flayed man is a sight

A flayed man holds no secrets
A flayed man does as he’s told
A peaceful land, a quiet people
A saying centuries old

The Leech Lord is clever
Quick, ruthless, ahead
Of all the plans, he’s never
Caught with a feeling of dread

When a subject crossed him
And married a young wife
While the man was hanging
With her, Roose created a life

The King in the North
Was becoming tiresome
A boy, playing at the hearth
Listening to his mother hum

A wedding at the Twins
The Freys will receive you
The guest right always wins
The Freys are always true

For years the Boltons have
Wanted to control the North
But the Starks always had
Until Roose stepped forth

Knives drawn, crossbow bolts flying
His mothers face in shards
The King in the North dying
‘Jaime Lannister sends his regards’

by Dracarya

Images from episode 4, “Garden of bones”

Robb continues his war against the Lannisters with Lord Bolton by his side 

An all- around look on Westeros!

as usual on our blog, Spoilers galore!

A raged, hungry, rioting mob, throwing filth and feces,
Got grip of a defenceless, highborn girl and torn her gown to pieces.
Being of noble birth, and showing wealth were the maiden’s crimes And so poor Lolys Stokeworth got raped a hundred times

_____________________________________________________

"If you can’t protect yourself, die, get out of the way
cause sharp steel and strong arms rule this world, there is no other way”

Yet pretty little Sansa Stark got saved by the Hound,
Cause there’s more, even in a harsh man’s heart, it just has to be found
_____________________________________________________

A hundred silver shiny coins, and one gold piece to pay
The lion cub’s, bride-made-whore, that got sent on her way
She was an orphaned, crofter’s child and he’s a Lord’s dwarf-son
And so Tysha, had to get raped for him to take a (sharp) lesson
______________________________________________________

"There is a tool for every task, a task for every tool",
“You can’t eat love, nor buy a horse with it, nor warm your halls, you fool.”

And so Tywin Lannister lived as he saw fit,
Untill he died, killed by his son, covered in blood and shit
_______________________________________________________

A pack of vicious feral dogs, known as Ramsay’s bitches,
Have bitten into flesh n drunk blood more than Roose’s leeches.
The bastard likes human pray and hunts em down for sport,
The “lucky” die during the hunt, the others, flayed in the Dreadfort.
________________________________________________________

"A peaceful land, a quiet people, has always been my rule."
But soon everyone will know, how false you’ve been and cruel!

by Wyman’s Cook

empirestyle:

Roose Bolton is coming, look busy

You have to remember your name..

Jeyne, Jeyne, it rhymes with pain,
What’s love really worth?
He won every battle, but he lost the war,
The King who Lost the North

Wed, Wed, it rhymes with red,
White banners red with blood.
Flayed men and weasels pouring in,
To kill the ones you love.

Cat, Cat, it rhymes with mad,
Nails raking down her cheeks.
Her first son, and her last, is slain,
She laughs until she shrieks.

Roose, Roose, it rhymes with noose
From which you’ll all be hung
Day by day, life by life,
She’ll kill you one by one.

By Bride of Winter

Roose

His words are Winter is Coming
But my blade is sharp
Ice is now nothing but shards
How I hate musicians and their harps
Jamie Lannister sends his regards


By The GreatRon
Arya’s “The Pointy End” - a circle diss!
Well I am glad y’all set it off,Used to be loyal but now your just sorry soft,Thought y’all were down with Winterfell,But really y’all can all burn in seven hells!Roose supposed to be loyal and a friend and stick,Lord Walder saw your behind and went in it quick,Got jealous when Robb got his own monarchy,But I am a Stark and ain’t no one bumping me,Trying to be like Jon and Ghost,You can threaten all day but you don’t come close,You killed my mother and brother like cowards,But I am going to pluck you flowers,The Freys are going to be fried like cheap bread,and Roose I am going to smash in your head,Supposed to be the Starks’ friend?Backstabbers you will catch THE POINTY END . .The bigger the rat, the bigger the peeling,and who cares about a weak sorry villain,You getting punked real sweet,and Roose Bolton is smelling like Tywin Lannister’s feet,Because all your are is a little errand boy,Like a peasant kid, trying to earn a toy,and don’t give me that silly grin,Because I remember when you couldn’t even afford gin,Broke as a mole town brothel joke,It will warm my heart,When Roose and his punk Ramsay get torn apart,Yes then I will have a grin,The Boltons will get stuck with the pointy end!!!You insulted my honor and broke my covenant,You insulted my honor and broke my covenant,You insulted my honor and broke my covenant,If I ever see you Lord Walder I want be hesitant,To dump you in a ditch, you sorry witch,Think you the mack? You are nothing but a ruined turnip sack,Stabbed my brother and mother in the back?Then burned their mean while they were drinking and eating?I am going to give you a severe beating . .But if Roose was as smart as me,All Freys would be hanging from a tree,Flame, Up, Flame on,Now the Twins will be gone . .Kissing up to the Lannisters to be Lord Paramount,Silly Geezer what are you thinking about?You getting punked by Tywin and Queen Cersei,and I will show you and them no mercy,When I finish my Faceless Man training,You all will be in deep pain’nFrom the greatest to the smallest,I am going to drop wildfire on you all’estUntil all the Starks Enemies are at an end,Oh Yes, Lord Walder gets stuck with the Pointy End!!!!By ServantonIce

Arya’s “The Pointy End” - a circle diss!

Well I am glad y’all set it off,
Used to be loyal but now your just sorry soft,
Thought y’all were down with Winterfell,
But really y’all can all burn in seven hells!

Roose supposed to be loyal and a friend and stick,
Lord Walder saw your behind and went in it quick,
Got jealous when Robb got his own monarchy,
But I am a Stark and ain’t no one bumping me,
Trying to be like Jon and Ghost,
You can threaten all day but you don’t come close,
You killed my mother and brother like cowards,
But I am going to pluck you flowers,
The Freys are going to be fried like cheap bread,
and Roose I am going to smash in your head,
Supposed to be the Starks’ friend?
Backstabbers you will catch THE POINTY END . .

The bigger the rat, the bigger the peeling,
and who cares about a weak sorry villain,
You getting punked real sweet,
and Roose Bolton is smelling like Tywin Lannister’s feet,
Because all your are is a little errand boy,
Like a peasant kid, trying to earn a toy,
and don’t give me that silly grin,
Because I remember when you couldn’t even afford gin,
Broke as a mole town brothel joke,
It will warm my heart,
When Roose and his punk Ramsay get torn apart,
Yes then I will have a grin,
The Boltons will get stuck with the pointy end!!!

You insulted my honor and broke my covenant,
You insulted my honor and broke my covenant,
You insulted my honor and broke my covenant,

If I ever see you Lord Walder I want be hesitant,
To dump you in a ditch, you sorry witch,
Think you the mack? You are nothing but a ruined turnip sack,
Stabbed my brother and mother in the back?
Then burned their mean while they were drinking and eating?
I am going to give you a severe beating . .
But if Roose was as smart as me,
All Freys would be hanging from a tree,
Flame, Up, Flame on,
Now the Twins will be gone . .
Kissing up to the Lannisters to be Lord Paramount,
Silly Geezer what are you thinking about?
You getting punked by Tywin and Queen Cersei,
and I will show you and them no mercy,
When I finish my Faceless Man training,
You all will be in deep pain’n
From the greatest to the smallest,
I am going to drop wildfire on you all’est
Until all the Starks Enemies are at an end,
Oh Yes, Lord Walder gets stuck with the Pointy End!!!!

By ServantonIce

Roose Bolton’s Take on the RW

My blades are sharp,
But my tongue is sharper,
My son is dark,
But mines is darker,
Robb was slipping,
So my homie Lord Walder
and I had to send him dipping,
Right before this altar .

Tonight we dine on slain wolf flesh,
Robb didn’t past this test . .
Yes, I must confess,
My boy Ramsay and I we are a mess,
But you mess with me, you are messing with the best,
In the ground rotten with his father, Robb does rest . .

I got no loyalty for those who stand in my way,
This is the Game of Thrones and I am going to play
To win, to gain all the power I can,
The Starks are done, like a rusted old can.

Lady Catelyn Tully,
Thought she was gully,
But swim little fish swim on down the stream,
This for her turned into a bad dream,
First a feast, second a bedding,
Finally the illest my turn the Red Wedding!!!

By ServantonIce

The Tale of the Red Wedding

Beware of the House of Undying,
A vision of death on its throne,
The Crone sees The Mother is grieving,
For a King and her son who is gone.

For some wars are won with swords,
But more are won with quills,
Tywin moved the puppets, yes,
But Bolton got the kills.

As guests they arrived at the wedding,
Where The Stranger joined the feast,
And dancing turned to bloody fight,
Now the King wears the head of a beast.

As the fires slowly turn into embers,
they are hung from the neck, one by one.
What the turncloaks forgot, is the North remembers,
Until the day they are all gone.

Wrong tunes, sung by steelclad cowards,
Wrong rhythms from drums everywhere,
the signal to betray the North?
The Reynes of Castamere!

And now at every dark, by midnight,
When the castle freezes in fear,
Ghostly shapes of a wolf and dead king,
Appear and again disappear.

Accursed in the eyes of gods and men,
Lion and Weasel and Leech,
The river runs red and the wrong king is dead,
Now see who’s next to screech. (that one is bad, I know…)

As the fires slowl turn into embers,
they are hung from the neck, one by one.
What the turncloaks forgot, is the North remembers,
Until the day they are all gone.

Combined efforts by Thapphires, The GriffinReborn, Aneurin Frey, A Free Shadow and Lady of Oldcastle